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d745
05-06-12, 05:25
Hi

Bette has been diagnosed with advanced breast cancer. She came home Friday 03/04/2012 They didn’t give us any supplies. She has a open wound on her chest. They gave us 1 petroleum gauze patch. I have been able to find these and order some. They also sent 1 per cut mesh adhesive strip (sort of a pre cut strip similar to a peel and stick strip) I used this to change her dressing. I measured the strip and it is 2 inches wide by 8 inches long. It is like a mesh strip with adhesive on it. Can anyone help me to find this product? Note: it is very soft and pliable.

I haven’t been here for a long time. And it is so nice for you guys to be here when I need help

Thank you

Dave

Reasonable Rascal
05-06-12, 13:54
Hi Dave,

Can you supply a brand name and/or product number? That would aid the search immensely.

RR

d745
05-06-12, 15:28
No there was a little strip of paper with the adhesive strip attached to it no names or anything. The hospital put a few things into a little plastic box and sent it home with her. I guess I can use 2 inch tape. Thanks for helping

Reasonable Rascal
05-06-12, 22:25
For what it was worth any way. Here to help.

RR

d745
05-07-12, 02:08
Thank you for being here

pa4ortho
05-08-12, 16:07
dave: sounds like you are describing the very popular 3M medipore tape. patent # 5,496,605

expensive but very few alergic reactions, stays put but does not irritate skin.

Dave I am not looking at the wound so its hard to judge but tegaderm is a very different product but is a favorite of mine as it alows the wound to be sealed from the environment and alows gentle showers. usually can be found on ebay for cheap.

Options: if doing frequent dressing changes or long term dressing changes consider laying down a base strip of 2 inch wide tape in paralel rows on oposite sides of the incision. next make tabs by taking a strip and stick one edge to the center of a base strip and fold it lengthwise and stick the other edge down. should form an upside down t shape in cross section. sorry hard to describe. next repeat on the other base strip. Next place some safety pins in each of the tabs along the length of the wound. after dressing the wound instead of taping the dressing in place simple lace the gauze in place by looping rubber bands over the safety pins. this way you conserve tape and avoid irritating the skin by constant tape removal and replacement.

questions: size of wound, color of base of wound, any drainage?, is this a post radiation burn?, is surrounding skin intact?, is the location dificult to manage because of contour of arm pit or fold of breast?,

pa4ortho

d745
05-09-12, 00:03
Hi pa4ortho and reasonable rascal

Thanks for posting, your reply has helped.
Bette has let her problem go and never told me about it until it was to late. She has stage 4 breast cancer and it is has gotten into her lymph nodes and is in her head. I don’t know how long she has. I was completely blindsided. I am being blamed for not taking her to a Dr sooner by her family and the er doctor. I never knew, as soon as I found out I took her to the Hospital. I don’t know how to take care of her but I will do the best I can. She is in quite a bit of pain, and the darn medications are quite expensive. I don’t know how to dress a wound but am learning. The cancer erupted from her breast and the wound is the size of 4 quarters side by side. But she has small sores all over her shoulder and side of her head. My goal is to make her as comfortable as I can and be there for her. She starts radiation next week. I don’t think any of the wounds are going to heal up. I am trying to keep them as clean and covered as I can. She is already experiencing a personality change.

I don’t understand how you are describing the bandage but it is nice to talk to someone. It seems easier with a stranger, and you are empathetic and it is appreciated. I am very angry and hurt she chose not to tell me. She is 68 and I am 67 and I can’t move her at all. Sort of a bad back. The nurses at the hospital said if it gets to be too much to bring her back.

Thanks.

Dave

pa4ortho
05-09-12, 12:18
1. not your fault she has cancer
2. not your fault it was not picked up sooner.

To find out why fam and er doc are acting the way they are go on you tube and look up "giraffe in quicksand" for a fun way to see a dramitization of the greiving process. then go out and read on death and dying by elizabeth kubbler ross. Keep doing what you are doing and love her.

take care of you its an endurance event not a sprint.

if fam or others are not making progress and are toxic emotionally then explain why you are excluding them from you. Point them to the same resources as described above. The flip side is as her mentation changes you will need all the help you can get for 24 hr care.

Your intelectual bandwidth is likely overwhelmed with this huge event. Most health care providers understand that. So dont be afraid to ask your health care provider many questions. Ask for written instructions or more detailed explainations. Ask for a wound care nursing consult to teach you how to care for wounds. Ask for pain meds as needed. Get Hospice care involved.

Dont forget to keep doing fun things together that does not require a lot of work on her part.

pa4ortho

d745
05-09-12, 15:13
Thanks again for a great post and your suggestions are very much appricated.

Dave

Reasonable Rascal
05-11-12, 13:05
Dave, just so you know there is a private, members-only forum available to use down below on the page. You are more than welcome to use it to discuss matter privately with other members. You will see it as Wart Talk (off topic discussions).

pa4ortho has offered some good advise and I heartily concur. I knew of at least one other woman who concealed breast cancer until it erupted and was no longer able to be hidden. That was a former high school teacher's (mine) wife some years ago. I do not know of the final outcome in that case as I was away from my home town by then.

I realize there is not a lot I and others can do considering the distance between us, but we are here to offer if nothing else a shoulder to lean on, if not practical advise.

ER docs are people too; they come is all sizes and flavors and temperaments. They are just as prone to jumping to conclusions as anyone else (though by education and training they are not supposed to be).

Likewise family. People who are not around all the time cannot conceive how one person can conceal and ailment of such drastic proportions from someone they interact with on a daily basis. But it happens all the time. A couple of months ago I worked with a nurse who exhibited all the signs of bronchitis or sub-acute pneumonia and had been for a month or longer to varying degrees.

Long story/short version she knew she had cancer and was determined to address it on her terms. Within 2 weeks she called off sick, finally saw a local doc, was diagnosed with terminal cancer, resigned, went back to the Midwest, and died on her own terms. Yet the people closest to her - including her best friend and housemate - had nary a clue as to the severity of the situation.

I am not trying to be a Gloomy Gus here but only to point out for others that people can and often do successfully conceal serious illness that otherwise does not physically disable until it is very progressed.

You are doing to right thing and I will keep you in my prayers for strength, and a positive outcome for your wife.

Do not hesitate to vent if needed, or ask advise.

RR

d745
05-11-12, 14:36
Thank you Reasonable.

I do appreciate your comments/help. I will write more as I get the information.

Thanks

Dave